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The Dog HaikuBy UnknownI love my master; Thus I perfume myself with This long-rotten squirrel I lie belly-up In the sunshine, happier than You ever will be Today I sniffed Many dog butts- I celebrate By kissing your face I sound the alarm! Paperboy- come to kill us all- Look! Look! Look! Look! Look! I sound the alarm! Mailman Fiend- come to kill us all- Look! Look! Look! Look! Look! I sound the alarm! Meter reader- come to kill us all- Look! Look! Look! Look! Look! I sound the alarm! Garbage man- come to kill us all- Look! Look! Look! Look! Look! I sound the alarm! Neighbor's cat- come to kill us all- Look! Look! Look! Look! Look! I lift my leg and Whiz on each bush. Hello, Spot- Sniff this and weep How do I love thee? The ways are numberless as My hairs on the rug My human is home! I am so ecstatic I have Made a puddle I hate my choke chain- Look, world, they strangle me! Ack Ack Ack Ack Ack Ack! Sleeping here, my chin On your foot- no greater bliss- well, Maybe catching cats Look in my eyes and Deny it. No human could Love you as much I do The cat is not all bad- She fills the litter box With Tootsie Rolls Dig under fence- why? Because it's there Because it's there I am your best friend, Now, always, and especially When you are eating You may call them fleas, But they are far more- I call them a vocation My owner's mood is Romantic- I lie near their Feet I fart a big one
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This
page last updated:
Friday, 27. June 2003